Far Away and Dreaming

Game of Love

2008-12-22T16:14:00.000-08:00

"We, though, are going to love—love and be loved. First we were loved, now we love. He loved us first." - [ First Book of John 4:19 ]

"If you believe in love at first sight, you never stop looking." - [ Closer : film ]

I have been reading and thinking about (analysing) the concept of love. Yes love. In all it's forms; agape, eros, philia, storge, xenia. More specifically I was thinking about love and religion.

I recently read that all religions - one would assume the world religions such as Christianity, Islam, Hinduism, Buddhism, etc, etc - have love at their center. When I read that I somehow struggled with the notion. History - along with my own personal experience, study and observation - does not seem to support the idea that all religions have love at their base. In fact, I don't believe any of them do... well... maybe they do have love at their center: conditional love.

I have come to the conclusion that religion has conditional love, in the sense that it presents the Supreme Being as a type of 'player', i.e. He says, "if you want my love and acceptance, then do this and that. Only then will I accept you. Then, I will not hold my love from you". If this is true, then what a dilemma we are all in! Whether you accept it or not, all of us need and desire love; unconditional love (a love that loves us because of who we are, nothing else). We chase it, we pursue it, we're hurt by it... but we still continue wanting it! Why?! Stupidity?! Or perhaps we were created like that; to want and desire this 'unattainable' love. And if you believe in a Creator and if in fact He offers only conditional love, ie. it's only valid when we're trying to please Him, then it means nothing. Only loved because of what we're doing, not who we are...

So what do we do? It's a dilemma. We know that people cannot give or provide unconditional love and if God is the source of love, then the whole matter is ironic. We deeply desire that which we cannot possibly have.

It's like a one-way relationship, where we must commit and work at keeping the love and yet God does not really have to do anything. If you have ever been in a one-sided relationship with someone, you will know what I am talking about; you will know how much it hurts. You try to win the heart of other and take the responsibility by committing yourself, but the other does not return the favour, instead they just enjoy the security and pleasures of being loved and cared for without committing.

For me, this certainly clears up some of the doubt as to why Jesus was killed all that time ago. He came claiming that nothing was needed to attain the love of God. Nothing. That in fact rendered the control of religion powerless which I am sure insulted the religious leaders and people of those times. If one does not need to follow the rules of religion, then one cannot be controlled...

Some believe this man, Jesus, was in fact the Creator himself, lowering himself to the form of his creation - a human - to actually demonstrate his love. And when in love, the only way to do it is by going personally to your beloved.

That is shocking, it's almost incomprehensible.

Through Her Eyes

2008-07-09T17:48:00.000-07:00

"... do me a favor: Agree with each other, love each other, be deep-spirited friends. Don't push your way to the front; don't sweet-talk your way to the top. Put yourself aside, and help others get ahead. Don't be obsessed with getting your own advantage. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand." [ Philippians 2:3 :: The Message ]

"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves." [ Philippians 2:3 :: NIV ]

A theme I have been thinking a lot about recently; it keeps coming up in one form or another. The self... or more specifically, this observed phenomenon we call 'selfishness' which seems such a common trait in most of us. It's so easy to notice and even be annoyed by it in others. It's not difficult at all in fact. But seeing it in ourselves - if we even care to self analyse - is not so easy and something that rarely happens. Often our own selfishness goes unnoticed at the detriment of those around us.

Sadly so much of what I do - actually probably most of what I do - is motivated and driven by a need I have, a desire I have, a want I have. Even when we do such noble and caring acts, deep at the heart of it, there is more 'self' than we would care to acknowledge. What can I get from this situation? How will my actions benefit me? What will they be able to provide me? How shall he/she satisfy my needs, my wants?... me

... It's sad.

A desperate attempt, a 'clutching at straws', a 'chasing of the wind'; It all comes to nothing. Self preservation may protect and insulate, it may give a sense of security, of stability, make you untouchable. It may fulfil a temporary satisfaction, answer an immediate need, desire, it may give us what we want for the moment... but... then what

Selfishness - putting one's self first - ironically seems only to result in loss and destruction of self. The real self.

I am seriously thinking about the experiences in my life and I cannot find any positive outcome from putting one's self first, for being selfish. Honestly, I cannot find one reason to do so... maybe apart from the fact it is so easy to do.

"She never really had a chance
On that fateful moonlit night
Sacrificed without a fight
A victim of her circumstance

Now that Ive become aware
And Ive exposed this tragedy
A sadness grows inside of me
It all seems so unfair

Im learning all about my life
By looking through her eyes

Just beyond the churchyard gates
Where the grass is overgrown
I saw the writing on her stone
I felt like I would suffocate

Inloving memory of our child
So innocent, eyes open wide
I felt so empty as I cried
Like part of me had died

Im learning all about my life
By looking through her eyes

And as her image
Wandered through my head
I wept just like a baby
As I lay awake in bed

And I know what its like
To lose someone you love
And this felt just the same

She wasnt given any choice
Desperation stole her voice
Ive been given so much more in life
Ive got a son, Ive got a wife

I had to suffer one last time
To grieve for her and say goodbye
Relive the anguish of my past
To find out who I was at last

The door has opened wide
Im turning with the tide
Looking through her eyes"

[ DreamTheater :: Through Her Eyes ]

Life Definition

2008-01-16T15:32:00.000-08:00

“For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it.” - the old book, the Bible

I did a quick search on the internet for a definition of the term ‘life’. I was surprised to find a lack of definitions and most of the ones I found were purely scientific and …well… shallow, meaningless. Sorry, no offence to those who’s lives are solely based on the scientific. I personally believe science has contributed in many good ways to our lives, though at it’s core it is hollow, empty… science, in and of itself is not enough.

Life (def): “The property or quality that distinguishes living organisms from dead organisms and inanimate matter, manifested in functions such as metabolism, growth, reproduction, and response to stimuli or adaptation to the environment originating from within the organism.”

If that’s all there is to it, then well, what a let down. Who knows, maybe there will never be a concrete definition of this word life; maybe there does not need to be. Perhaps it is only defined by experiencing it and everyone’s definition is a little different from the person next to them...

Though one thing is for sure, life is a short-lived ride, of possible intimate relationships, achievable spiritual heights, potential refining moments and knowable purpose.

Windy

2007-12-28T22:54:00.000-08:00

The weather here has taken a sudden turn for the worst in the last 24 hours; it’s very cold and extremely windy. I live just across the road from the office so it’ relatively easy to go home during my work breaks – which is exactly what I did today.

On the way I came across a man who was half lying, half sitting on the icy ground, as the wind blew snow over him. He looked a little like a bum and as I got closer I notice that he was profusely bleeding from his head. Either he had fallen open and cut a great gash on his forehead or someone had beaten him. Regardless I didn’t think he would survive if he sat there for much longer without something on his head; it was very cold. And no one else appeared to be interested in helping him.

I didn’t know how to talk with him – the disadvantage of being in a foreign country without knowing the language – so I thought it was just better to do something for him instead of talk. So I went home and thought I would give him one of my hats to keep him warm at least. By the time I got back, he was gone. Ah well… so much for that idea.

It really makes you feel helpless in these situations.

Another Dead Body

2007-12-23T19:05:00.000-08:00

I had just come back to Russia from two weeks leave in Australia, when I saw a very unusual gathering. I looked out my window into the cold wintry street outside to notice around 10 men dressed in black, all smoking cigarette, waiting... what for I had no idea.

More and more people joined them and my curiosity increased dramatically as I too waited for what was about to happen. A mini-bus pulled up and two boys got out and were shuffling around in the back. They produced two small wooden stands and placed them just in front of my neighbour's doorway. Then they proceeding to carrying a small wooden coffin from the van and placed it on the two wooden stands. The coffin was open and my first thought was that it was a little child as the coffin was small, but then as I looked more carefully I realised it was an old person. What had seemed like a small mafia gathering, had now turned into a funeral in front of my apartment.

An Orthodox priest arrived and began swinging a vase of incense over the body as he chanted for about 20 minutes. My neighbour, whom I assumed was the wife of the deceased, came out and began wailing over her dead husband's body. I recognised her by her voice: she was the one I would always hear shouting and cursing her husband most late nights. Presumable because he would always come home drunk. I immediately thought how lonely she would be from now on as she would have no one to shout at or argue with.

How difficult life can be here...

How regretful life can be when we take people for granted...

How sad when our loved ones pass away, and even more sad when we realise we never appreciated them when they were still with us...

Trust

2007-11-15T16:01:00.000-08:00

"Trust: A firm reliance on the integrity, ability, or character of a person or thing. Something committed into the care of another. Reliance on something or someone in the future; hope"

"Far better to take refuge in God than trust in people" [Psalm 118:8]

Just now I was walking along the footpath and noticed large snowflakes dancing about around me and falling on the lid of my warm Starbucks-imitation mocha coffee, melting instantly, gone forever...

When someone close to you betrays your trust, it hurts and a part of you wants to close. The special bond you thought you both had falls to the ground; gone, like transient snowflakes falling from the sky. Confusion sets in as you wonder what intimacy you shared with that person was real in the first place and whether it ever meant anything to them. You struggle to believe anything they say to you.

If you believe you are a person that is called to a higher life, then I somehow feel that your strength is not defined by taking revenge, inflicting emotional pain or hurt, denying friendship, doing the same to the one who betrayed you. Instead these people get their strength from quite the opposite. They forgive, love, forget and remain open to those who hurt them, to those who betrayed their trust. It is the most difficult and hardest road to walk. Oh, it's almost impossible - this I know without doubt - though I see a glimpse of a life that is so free on the 'other side'. But do you have to walk that hard and seemingly impossible road to get there?

We do... we do.

Beauty and Ugliness

2007-10-18T00:28:00.000-07:00

I just got back from a trip in the Czech Republic and Poland. The city of Prague is very beautiful and it’s architecture stunning...

Though my holiday was one of contrasts: that of great beauty and great ugliness. The stark contrast came when I visited Auschwitz, the largest and most infamous Nazi extermination camp built primarily for the Jews. As the tour group I was with walked through the grounds and buildings, I tried desperately to imagine the torment and horror that took place not that long ago. But the feeling I expected was not there. I guess it was during the day and their were swamps of loud, obnoxious tourists; the ambience was lacking.

Though later the horror of it all, the past atrocities came flooding in and it was impossible to fathom that over 1.1 million humans were suffocated from a gas that the German soldiers poured down a couple of small holes. The chamber was mostly air-tight, so death was imminent within 20 minutes. Only 19 small tin cans of this gas were needed to exterminate around 2000 people at a time. For them, it was very efficient and cheap.

Life is a contrast of beauty and ugliness, love and hate, pain and comfort, joy and sadness, blessings and curses, hope and despair. I don't personally believe in the need (or the Ying-Yang ideology) for both contrasting elements in life. One can exist without the other. One can be destroyed by the other. But it does amaze me when extreme, overwhelming darkness is pierced by a small light... by a small 'goodness'. It shines ever so brightly.

Wild At Heart

2007-09-27T16:23:00.001-07:00

I've had a few people ask me what was going through my mind as I wrote that last post and what it's about. To be honest, it's about many things, some related to me and my world, others a lot larger than that and I think universal.

I am reading a book at the moment, entitled "Wild At Heart", in which author John Eldredge speaks of the innermost part of a man's heart; specifically it's captivity and it's freedom. The inner heart was designed for adventure, for a journey, for a mission and when that original desire fades or dies - either through life's struggles, life's dullness, anguish and pain, social pressures to conform, family and friends expectations, disappointment, lack of hope, fading vision, religion, the 9-to-5 office job, or whatever - the man is no longer 'living' but merely surviving. His call in life is now but a faint whisper.

Sadly, most of us aren't living because our hearts were damaged at one point in life due to one of those reasons mentioned. So, in an attempt to free it, we put so much effort in searching for it in the wrong places: worldly success, the ultimate career, a girl, religion, hobbies, escapism through drugs and alcohol... meanwhile causing our facade - the image we portray to others - to imprison us, covering up the real problem and hiding who we really are... our 'true self' becomes lost. We continue to be empty.

So what was going through my mind as I wrote that poem? Well, I was asking myself 'where have I been searching for my true self, where have I been looking to find satisfaction and inner peace?'. It is a regular self-check I require so that my heart may be free.

It's usually the small, subtle things that sneak up and steal our freedom.

What breaks a Heart

2007-09-09T21:33:00.000-07:00

What breaks a heart
Can it be fully restored
How many times can it break
Before it closes forever

The seasons change
Oh the fragrance of Spring
Bright, warmth, sun of Summer
Red, orange, yellow, vibrancy of Autumn
Fallen leaves, impending chill, white of Winter

The journey continues
Searching for one’s heart
Where can it be found
Where can it be healed

The seasons change
Another time, another horizon
Days pass, time moves forward
Driven, thirsty for satisfaction of soul
Where shall one drink

The journey reveals
The longing and cry of the heart
Lost in the deepness of woods oh so dark
From here, where shall one venture

The seasons change
In desperation shall one fall
Chasing after the wind
Caged, empty, bewildered

Or shall one fly from here
Into the Summer sun

What heals a heart
Can it be fully embracing
How much can it love
After it is freed forever

Author :: Ryan
Photographer :: http://www.flickr.com/photos/alphageek/57100167

One Dark Evening

2007-08-21T16:40:00.000-07:00

It was late as I walked from the bus-stop back to my apartment through the pouring rain, I felt my heart weighing heavy. My mind was wondering, my emotions slightly saddened... then...

I noticed a man passing me in the dark; i had seen him before. I nodded and murmured a small greeting. Without saying anything, he turned to me and in a gasp, said 'help'. He fell on me as i tried to grab him, still trying to hold my umbrella in one hand. Something was very wrong. The first thought that went through my mind was that he had been stabbed.

As i held him in the pouring rain, i became soaked and continued to speak with him as he vomited and almost collapsed again. he said he had extreme emotional pain and that he also had severe chest pains. He kept saying "I just want cry, but i can't. Please, please I want to cry. I just want to cry".

I spent about 40 mins in the dark of night with this man, holding him, asking God to help him, to save him. The rain was heavy; i began to get desperate and my heart which was already heavy, just got heavier.

It was late, though i could see he needed help. I half-carried him across streets, through mud and puddles, continually talking to him so he remained conscience until we arrived at the hospital. Fortunately there were some Russian nurses just closing the hospital door as we arrived. The man was quickly taken in and the doctor rushed him through to emergency.

I walked home in a surreal state of mind and I was depressed.

Today i heard this man was in a serious condition and he had a medical evacuation to Japan.

Fame

2007-08-07T23:42:00.000-07:00

I just watched 'Fame' the other day and wow, what an inspirational movie! It was filmed in 1980 (when I was born) and features a group of highschool students that attend a special arts institute in New York over the period of 4 years.

What I found interesting was the intense motivation these students had to succeed in the arts, whether it be dancing, music or drama. It wasn't so much their love of dancing, music or drama that pushed them to succeed... but their pain. For most of them, their lives were a mess or their background was less than ideal, and through that pain and fear they were driven to discover themselves and this life.

Actress, Irene Cara (21 years old at the time) was one of the students... and well... with her freedom and charisma ...she was just amazing! She sings the theme song "Fame" which is a very powerful piece. Irene later went on to co-write and perform the song "What a Feeling" from the movie soundtrack Flashdance. A talented girl indeed.

Coming To Life

2007-07-13T17:46:00.000-07:00

"He first loved us" - 1 John 4:19

I believe it was the brilliant writer C.S. Lewis that once penned the words 'to love is to be vulnerable'. If we decide to love anything then our hearts will possibly be broken. In order to prevent it from breaking we must give it to no one... so then it becomes unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable... "safe".

It's so unfortunate that we want to play it safe most of the time and our actions reflect that. Rather than being open and vulnerable, we want to close off and protect ourselves, becoming impenetrable. I guess the challenge in finding the other side of love, in experiencing it's beauty and all that it has to offer is to deny self and take the chance... the chance that one could be broken or one could come to life.

How difficult and humbling would it be to say 'I am going to love you even if my heart breaks... I will love you even though I may have none in return'.

"I always listened to the same sad song in the wintertime when I drive home
Then her and Id sit on her couch where we used to dream of falling in love
And all this time I thought that she had killed me
And all these years I spent in the graveyard weeping
But I feel blood pouring through these veins after all
And I feel blood washing through these stains after all
And I am coming to life"

"I spent a thousand lone cold nights thinking I would gladly hurt if I could feel
I spent a thousand empty days just looking for a girl to make me real
And all this time your face was all around me
And all those loving arms that held me so close
And I feel blood pouring through these veins after all
And I feel blood washing through these stains after all
And I am coming to life"

"All I taste and all I feel all I found is you is real and right and I am coming to life
You are the breath I breathe You hold me to belief
You died so I could be alive and free from me and I am coming to life
I used to listen to the same sad song in the wintertime when I drive home
Then her and Id sit on her couch where we used to dream of falling in love"

[ Normals :: Coming To Life ]

Run! Run! It's a bear!

2007-07-08T14:36:00.000-07:00

Yesterday a group of us went out for a bbq after church to a place not too far away. It was near a small stream and there were quite a few people around who were just spending the day relaxing, swimming and sunbathing. Towards the late evening, around 5 or 6, a friend of mine, Kostya, came running up over a small embankment with a look of shear terror on his face. He was shouting something in Russian as he ran as fast as he could, with bag in hand. Suddenly everyone else began grabbing their children and running also. I finally worked out they were saying "Mishka", which means bear!
...and then I heard it! An extremely loud growl came from just over the embankment... it was close. That was enough for me to start running.

We left most of our belongings behind and ran towards the cars. Unfortunately there was too many of us to all fit in the 3 cars, so we just waited as one of the guys drove his vehicle towards the direction of the bear whilst beeping his horn in an effort to scare it.

Who knows where it went. Though we did hear a lot of dogs barking up river, so we're guessing it went that way. Anyway, that gave us some time to gather all of the things we had left behind.

----

After that ordeal, we were all high on adrenaline as you might imagine. A few of us had to walk back. On the way home a very tiny black kitten befriended us as we walked. It was obviously abandoned and was trying desperately to follow. After awhile the poor thing could not keep up and fell behind; it cried out to us, but there was nothing we could do.

Further on I noticed two very dirty looking children; they were so young. Both of them were sifting through a large smelly trash heap. They found something edible and sat themselves down. They were obviously homeless or at least came from a broken home, parents possibly alcoholics. The contrast between there life and mine really struck me; here we were eating bbq with more than enough to go around and at the same time, here they were with nothing at all.

Anyway, I really wanted to talk with them or at least help them somehow, though the language barrier can be too much sometimes. So I asked my friend, Oksana to ask them if they are ok and needed something to eat. They were very shy and seemed a little uncomfortable, so I kept a little distance as she spoke. In the end we just gave them a small amount of money... which I know in itself, will do little to alleviate the pain and loneliness in their lives, but I hope that they somehow realise they are cared for regardless of their circumstances.

As we left, the little girl kept on glancing at us with intrigue. I guess she just didn't understand why complete strangers would do such a thing. It really saddens me.

Religion, Goo Goo Dolls & Other Matters

2007-06-29T16:31:00.000-07:00

"The glory of God is man fully alive." - St. Irenaeus

Freedom! A word made famous by the heroic Scot, William Wallace... well at least in the Hollywood version anyway. There are many times in my life where I just want to shout out the same words as though my life depended on it; then again, maybe it does!

There's a song I can relate to in many ways; it's What A Scene by one of my favourite rock bands at the moment, the Goo Goo Dolls. To me it seems to capture the transient reality of life's so-called pleasures and expectations; the pleasures we strive so hard to obtain, forsaking all else and the expectations we try to meet in order to be accepted. Both leave us feeling empty and imprisoned respectively.

"When you're feeling all wrong in the back of your mind again
How does it feel?
When you drop down
Everything's all the same..."

"Saccharine, caffeine, nicotine gum
All tastes sweet but it's not for long
And I just think you thought it would be"

Everyday I become more and more aware of the pleasures in my life that 'taste good' for the moment, but shortly after they are gone, leaving nothing. This is not something small ranging, but rather it stretches from the daily cup of coffee all the way to religion. The later is an important issue for me, as I consider my Creator to be very much intertwined in this journey of mine. Though I think many of us have squeezed the life out of life, in an attempt to fit religion into it.. or should I say, in an attempt to fit our life into religion.

I am not surprised when so many give up in their attempt at finding relationship with their Creator. As the glossy, highly-marketed surface image of religion fades and 'reality' sets in, the sparkle is no longer there and one can be left feeling somewhat empty. Is this how it is supposed to be? Wasn't life promised somewhere there?

I often feel that the Christian religion presented to us today lacks depth, the essence which should actually define it; as a result restrictive practices and rules take over. I observe it in aspects of my up-bringing and in my own life, as well as those around me. Rather than freeing, it imprisons. What we are expected to do and what we are expected to be, often drains us of life and the unique identity impressed upon us from before time. It is no different from social expectations in today's world:

"And when you're looking for truth on the cover of a magazine
How does it feel?
When you found out what you're not going to be
Oh, yeah"

"They give you your image and the things you believe
Open your eyes, tell me what did you see
And I just think you thought it so real"

"And all the beautiful images lining your walls
Pop radio screaming down the halls
And now you think you found something real
When it's all about money and the things that you need
Live a big lie and they all believe
And I just find that somehow obscene"

In the pages of old dusty archives, we read the simple words of a humble woodworker:

"I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full"

I know that somewhere in there lies freedom. Now, just to find it...

I dont know who you are

2007-06-25T15:42:00.000-07:00

The desire of the human heart, longing for a deeper companionship with something greater than life itself. To be wholly accepted by the one we do not know, the mystery we cannot explain, that presence which truly knows our inner self, the love that existed before time. So we search.

I'm standing on a bridge
I'm waiting in the dark ...
I'm listening but there's no sound
Isn't anyone trying to find me?
...
Trying to figure out this life

Wont you take me by the hand
take me somewhere new
I don't know who you are but I...
I'm with you
I'm with you

im looking for a place
searching for a face
is anybody here i know
...
no one likes to be alone

Isn't anyone trying to find me?
Won't somebody come take me home
...
I dont know who you are but I...
I'm with you

[ Avril Lavigne :: I'm With You ]

A Tribute to Pa: My Grandfather

2007-03-23T17:40:00.000-07:00

I have just arrived back from my holiday in Hong Kong and Thailand. It was a time of catching up with my parents and grandparents. Tragically my grandfather of 86 yrs, passed away on the last night of the holiday, leaving his beloved wife Mandy, of 83 yrs, whom he had been with most of his life. He was strong and very fit for his age; his passing was so unexpected. Though he passed away peacefully in his sleep in a place that was close to his heart.

Pa - as we all call him - was a man of loyalty. He served in World War II in the Navy and had visited Hong Kong many times in the past; he had accomplised a lot in his lifetime (too much to write here). He had so many stories he would tell us grandchildren. The funny stories were great and I will remember them for along time to come, but the quality that really struck me about Pa was the way he treated his lady, Mandy. He treated her like a princess for all the time I knew him. In fact, the last night I saw him he had just brought her a new diamond ring; in a way, I guess that was his last goodbye gift to her.

It was never too late for him to get out of bed and bring her a glass of water, it was never too early to wake up and make her breakfast in bed; this was something he did most of the time. You know, everyday whilst we were in Hong Kong, Pa would take every opportunity he could to just to hold Mandy's hand... she was his lady and he looked after her. They did everything together; they were one. And now, after 62 years of marriage, they have finally parted. Mandy had lost someone she treasured with all of her heart and later she said "but we were to go [pass away] together, he promised we would...".

I kept thinking to myself, would I have this same dedication to my future wife when the years have past and we are at such an age.

This type of loyalty and love is difficult to find.

A Blizzard and a Dead Body

2007-02-15T17:40:00.000-08:00

It has been snowing for the last two days here and it's building up; so much so, that the company I work for advised it's employees not to come into the office today... hmm... but here I am... must be a workaholic (but i doubt it).

Went walking to the local supermarket to pick up some essentials and happened to walk by a dead body. It was a lady who had been frozen - I am assuming from the night before - and she was laying outside an apartment block. Two unidentifiable men came and threw her onto a stretcher and carried her to a refrigerator truck... in fact it looked more like a meat truck! I mean, they didn't even cover her up. They even carried her through a group of children who were playing outside.

.... not a pleasant experience. I really didn't need to see that.

Keeping Up Traditions... Russian Police

2006-12-22T21:56:00.000-08:00

In many ways I should really have expected it; being the last day in Russia before I was to head back to Australia. Running into the police on the last day I am in a country seems to be the norm now.

So, I arrived home after a late night with friends....

*Ring* *Ring*.... I had just lain down to sleep when I heard my door bell ringing; it was a little unusual being so late and all, but I answered anyhow. It didn't really help, as the man on the other end of the speaker (Russian apartments have speakers on their doorbells) was speaking Russian. I just mumbled something like, 'I don't know you, go away' and went back to bed. The next thing I know, two guys are peering through my kitchen window...

*Ring* *Ring*... This time the man is shouting something along the lines of 'Open the door now! let us in now! Police!!'. Now, in Russia, it's common knowledge that you never open the door to anyone, even the police. So i had no idea what to do and had no idea what they were saying for that matter. I rang the security department of my company and asked for advice. They said do not open the door whatever you do! So i didn't, however by this time, the (so-called) policemen had got past the first door and were in the stairwell beating on my own front door... 'Open now, Police!'

The security department said that they would send some people... so I waited... and waited... and waited.

*Ring* *Ring*... the bell again. This time it's a lady; she speaks English. She asked me to open the door. At this point you can imagine how confused I was and had no idea who was who. So I hung-up on her and called the security department again. Yup, they confirmed that i could now open the door; it was safe; they had sent her along with two security guards.

By this time, the so-called police had disappeared. Someone suggested that my alarm system may have been faulty and hence why the police rocked up at my door...but I guess we'll never know.

I didn't sleep well after that.

And who said life is dull?!

Go Home....you're on holidays.

2006-12-12T17:37:00.000-08:00

Ok, so the conclusion to the previous blog...

I was fined. The company paid the fine. Additionally the company lawyers told us to log-out of our computers and not come back to the office until our visas are sorted out.... that will be next year! So basically I am on forced leave in Russia (but with full pay!)... so I'm not really complaining.

I'll be back in Australia on the 22nd of this month anyhow.

Illegal Worker: I'm being prosecuted by the Russian Authorities…

2006-11-27T17:36:00.000-08:00

That's right! Today I was informed that the Russian Authorities have filed a case against me (and about 40 other employees) and will prosecute tonight. Apparently we did not have the correct working VISA required by the current Russian Law. The company is to blame 100% as they are responsible for issuing the VISAs. However the implications of such a case against the individual can be a fine or - in the worst case scenario - imprisonment for 15 days and/or deportation. If deported, one cannot come back to Russia for 5 years!

Anyhow, the proceedings are tonight; so if I happen to be in Australia tomorrow... u know why :)

Breaking News: Tsunami heading this way

2006-11-15T17:49:00.000-08:00

Last night I was informed that there was a tsunami heading my way. Apparently there was an earthquake out at sea, measuring 8.1 on the Richter which in turn started a tsunami! I happened to flick on to the news channel which was issuing immediate evacuation of northern Japan and eastern Russia. The warning wasn't even mentioned on Russia local stations… go figure!

Anyway, the predicted waves weren't that big and as far as I know there was no damage or death. And it's only my second day back on the island… help!

How to get Arrested: Part II (Australia)

2006-11-15T17:35:00.000-08:00

Oh yeh, I had another run-in with the police… this time in Australia, on my last day before leaving for Russia again. It was bound to happen at some point or another; it was just a matter of 'when'.

Anyhow, I was racing down to the shops to buy another jumper for the winter in Sakhalin. We (me and my mum) only had 5 minutes before the shops were closing. Unfortunately we were stuck at a set of lights which were red, however the right-hand lane was green, so we indicated and pulled out to turn right instead (little did I know that it was a double white line)…. Anyway, to cut a long story short, there was a police car a long way back who saw us and gave immediate chase. We got to the shop just as they pulled up behind us with lights flashing.

In the mean time whilst I was being issued a ticket, my mother went into the shop that was closing and said to the staff…"Could you please just wait a few minutes, as my son wants to buy some clothing… he's just outside with the police at the moment".

Sheesh… talk about embarrassing!!!

Living the 'Russian' Way

2006-10-12T17:33:00.000-07:00

I have recently decided that after living in a hotel for a year, it's time to move out! Yup, I'm going to move into a 'real' house (apartment actually) and live like the Russians do... well... sort of. Sure the hotel is nice; you get free breakfast, laundry, they make ur bed every morning, free gym, etc, etc... but it's not 'home'.

So i am going to rough it! I have found an apartment, first floor, and hope to move in after i get back from Australia. It's nothing special, two rooms, bathroom and kitchen...but hey... it's sooo close to work. Will take me only 8 seconds (yes.. 8!) to walk to the office. Yup, that's gonna be handy in the winter when the snow's 2 meters deep!

The apartment blocks in Russia are pretty unsightly and the staircases... well... let's say they're not so nice. But inside the actual apartments they're fine.

My mum suggested I get a pet dog ... hmm... somehow I think she's just worried about me living in an apartment with no security.

Travel :: A Way of Life

2006-10-09T18:46:00.000-07:00

Hmm... I got a little bored and decided to list all the places I have traveled to over the last few years. I'm kinda shocked at how long the list is...i don't feel like i've been to all those places!! India doesn't really count as I was stuck in the airport and didn't really see anything...so ..yeh...

AUSTRALIA

Perth

Sydney

SINGAPORE

MALAYSIA

Kuala Lumpur

Malacca

THAILAND

Bangkok

PHUKET

Ko Phi Phi

BORNEO

Sabah

Sarawak

BRUNEI

HONG KONG

SOUTH KOREA

Seoul

Incheon

INDIA

Calcutta (Kolcutta)

OMAN

Muscat

UNITED ARAB EMIRATES

Dubai

JAPAN

Hakodate

Tokyo

Kyoto

Hiroshima

Miyajima

Hakaido

Osaka

RUSSIA

Sakhalin Island

Moscow

Saint Petersburg

GERMANY

Hamburg

Lubeck

Keil

FRANCE

Paris

Anncey

Megeve

Chamonix

SWITZERLAND

Geneva

Lucern

Zurich

HOLLAND

Amsterdam

The Hague

POLAND

Kracow

CZECH REPUBLIC

Prague

UK / Scotland

Stirling

Aberdeen

How to get arrested in Japan...

2006-07-31T17:21:00.000-07:00

I just got back from Hakodate, Japan. Was a very interesting place indeed. Some of the 'food' they eat is unbelievable, not to mention the lengths they go to in packaging it; takes five minutes to open a packet of chewing-gum because each piece is individually wrapped! It costs $200 USD for a single rock-melon in the markets... and I'm not joking! I'm sure it's worth every penny.

I was site seeing on the third day and a police car pulled up next to me. Four policemen jumped out and surrounded me, asking questions of my purpose in Japan, where i was from, etc,etc... I tried telling them that I didn't have a passport with me because it was in the Russian Embassy getting a new VISA (hence my reason for being in Japan) but unfortunately that was not enough. So i was hauled into the police car and taken to the police station for 4 hours of deliberation.

To cut a long story short, I had to write a letter of apology in which I said I was 'bery bery sorry'. Apart from that, Japan was enjoyable.

Keeping Up Traditions... Russian Police

2006-06-10T21:35:00.000-07:00

In many ways I should really have expected it; being the last day in Russia before I was to head back to Australia. Running into the police on the last day I am in a country seems to be the norm now.

So, I arrived home after a late night with friends....

*Ring* *Ring*.... I had just lain down to sleep when I heard my door bell ringing; it was a little unusual being so late and all, but I answered anyhow. It didn't really help, as the man on the other end of the speaker (Russian apartments have speakers on their doorbells) was speaking Russian. I just mumbled something like, 'I don't know you, go away' and went back to bed. The next thing I know, two guys are peering through my kitchen window...

*Ring* *Ring*... This time the man is shouting something along the lines of 'Open the door now! let us in now! Police!!'. Now, in Russia, it's common knowledge that you never open the door to anyone, even the police. So i had no idea what to do and had no idea what they were saying for that matter. I rang the security department of my company and asked for advice. They said do not open the door whatever you do! So i didn't, however by this time, the (so-called) policemen had got past the first door and were in the stairwell beating on my own front door... 'Open now, Police!'

The security department said that they would send some people... so I waited... and waited... and waited.

*Ring* *Ring*... the bell again. This time it's a lady; she speaks English. She asked me to open the door. At this point you can imagine how confused I was and had no idea who was who. So I hung-up on her and called the security department again. Yup, they confirmed that i could now open the door; it was safe; they had sent her along with two security guards.
By this time, the so-called police had disappeared. Someone suggested that my alarm system may have been faulty and hence why the police rocked up at my door...but I guess we'll never know.

I didn't sleep well after that.

And who said life is dull?!